RELATIONSHIPS

One of the reasons I write about relationship advice is because so much of the blogs and posts on relationships give shit advice. 

At the beginning of a relationship, you're usually one of two minds. One, this person is the ONE and you envision bed and breakfasts, white picket fences and puppies in your future. Two, well, this person is the one for right now, nothing too serious, we're just having fun.

But those initial feelings might mean nothing. The first could easily turn into a nightmare, either far too clingy or so not available. While the second could surprise you and fun evolved into so much more.

"The question is, is there a way you can tell from the beginning which of these relationships will last and which will fizzle? "

Most of the time at the beginning of a relationship, people are good at sharing, talking and trying to get to know each other. They are good at offering acceptance and approval. Hopefully the faces they choose to share with each other accurately represent who they are. We will not create the kind of relationship that will feed our soul by pretending to be someone other than who we are. Real relationships are formed when we willingly share who we really are, not who we think we should be or who we think our partner wants us to be. Openness and authenticity will help us better understand each other. 

But now, the current generation is taking relationships in different way. I don't know how to express this to you, but if they see a post on social media they try to relate it with their own story,but they don't know the person who made that post is actually suffering or just for like sake he posted. 

The things that might damage your relationship are:

• Lack of communication
• Trust issues
• Ego
• Selfishness
• Revenge
• Miss understanding 

But let me enlighten you on these points, now a days when people get angry they try to ignore the other person instead of solving the problem. The main cause behind this is Mobile phones, you will never get to know "how the other person is speaking, in what context he/she is speaking, how he is feeling right now" all you can see is a emotionless whatsapp message with a fake smily. Well that too might not be true. So if you have any issues with your relationship try to come forward and speak to them in person rather ignoring them or blocking them on social media.

Next is trust issues, well guys to be frank if you don't trust your partner there is no point of dragging your relationship. You should talk to them and end the relationship on a good note.

But let me tell you how this trust issue occurs generally when you broke the promise, or when you unintentionally hurt your partner. Never ever break someone's trust its very hard to rebuild it. Coming up with the ego thing, always remember your relationship is much much bigger than your ego. Whether its your mistake or not try to come forward and say sorry, instead of waiting. Ego can ruin your years of relationship in seconds. At that time always remember why you spent so long with this person ? Do you really want to end it like this?  and try to remember all the happy moments you guys spent together, this might help and change your mind.

Now let me tell you about selfishness,never be so selfish about anything. Always share everything with your partner, doesn't matter whether it is a small thing or big. You should always respect your partner.Love him/her the way you think, don't pretend to be strong in front of them.Its good to show them you're weak,needy and lonely sometimes. They should know all your faces and phases.

You know, whats really hurting about this generation? Let me tell you, when is person commits some mistake, the other person purposely commits a mistake to show him/her how it feels. I don't know how to put it into words but this actually kills the self esteem of the other guy, like i did it unintentionally and he/she did it on purpose. Guys never take revenge, always remember the person whom you're hurting is the one who loves you. I know we all dealing with one or the other problem, but stop and think is it really worth to hurt someone if you're hurt ?

In a nutshell, if the relationship is going through a bit of a stressful time (fighting, money problems, time issues etc.), we are more likely to stick around if we think the relationship will improve and bring happiness in the future. Basically, your partner is worth the time and effort.

But if we don't see things improving, or it's only short-term and the times are more bad than good, we're less likely to put in the work and help make the relationship succeed.

As far as new relationships go, those who saw a happier future with their significant other reported more commitment on a daily basis, and again one year later. The research also showed that when people anticipate more future satisfaction in the relationship, they are less likely to behave destructively and are more likely to respond constructively.

At last, always remember god is watching and karma is a bitch. Don't ever misjudge and leave your love just because you're hurt temporarily. Always try to communicate and express how you feel, hurt them with the truth but never comfort them with a lie, because a relationship based on a lie doesn't workout. Never compare your love story with others because every love story is unique. Try to build more understanding with endless love.

So if you want your relationship to last, your happiness — both current and future — is key. If all you get are good vibes, your relationship should be fine. Don't worry, be happy. Love will find a way.

"Nobody can predict the future. You just have to give your all to the relationship you're in and do your best to take care of your partner, communicate and give them every last drop of love you have. I think one of the most important things in a relationship is caring for your significant other through good times and bad."

~ MOHIT KUMAR